weight loss plan

Hello to all,

So, it's been a very productive week.  I spent the last two weeks dealing with work.  Gotta get the money coming in somehow!  Fortunately, the fatigue from radiation quickly resolved.  As I spoke in my last post, I'm on the post-radiation starvation diet because everything tastes HORRIBLE (as my 3 year old would say!).  I've lost the weight from steroids, plus a little bit more.  I'm not sure how much since I don't have a scale in the house!  However, now I feel hungry.  Every restaurant and fast food place I pass I think "Wow, I would like to eat there!" I have never felt the urge to cook as I do now when in the grocery store - "Oh, that looks good, I should get that!"  I'm talking even microwave dinners!  I'm hoping that I get through the craving phase while I still can't eat and then when I have a sense of taste back, I will be happy with fruit and vegetables!  Right now, the only thing I can tolerate is liquid and apples.  But I can't even eat a whole apple, just half.  It seems like anything that sits in my mouth turns to this nasty mush.  The dry mouth from radiation and my treatments don't help the issue I think. 

But anyways, enough with that!  I just did my treatment on Friday, so I won't have to do that again for 3 weeks.  I'm still waiting on test results from the consulting physician for her to make her recommendation for chemo.  I will be so happy to start that because it will be the beginning of the end.  I am so tired of this process!  It needs to be over so I can get on with life.  I almost feel like I'm holding my breath for something else to happen.  I'm glad that my radiation oncologist wants to do brain MRI frequently to monitor for anything.  I have my first on at the end of February, then every 3 months.  David keeps talking about the future and where he'll work and where we'll live and all I can think is - who know what will happen in the next couple of months, how can I plan 2 years in the future!??!  I do have faith that I will be around for awhile, but I don't want to "jinx" anything by having expectations.  Would that be taking advantage of God's grace?  Having expectations that he will protect me from more cancer just seems a little presumptuous.  I also think to the saying: "Don't worry about tomorrow, because if it happens you worried double, and if it doesn't, wasted today worrying about it"  So, I would rather just not think about it and take each day as it comes!


73 DAYS CANCER FREE                                                              FIGHT LIKE A GIRL!